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Dear ,
A few days ago, I told you about the importance of being a good listener. Many of the best business people and communicators I know posses this skill.
Today, I want to share some
techniques with you that will allow you to not only be a good listener, but a good ACTIVE listener. That means you are listening AND participating in the listening process.
6 Keys of Active Listening
1. Give your audience your UNDIVIDED attention -- Put the phone away and shelf any distractions. Whether the speaker is 8 years old or 80, if someone deserves your time, then they deserve your full attention.
2. Summarize what's being said -- Every now and
then, tell the person you want to be certain that you understand what they're saying -- and then summarize the last few sentences you heard. This shows you're listening and gives you a better grasp of what's being said. Plus, the listener will feel important when you do that.
3. Interrupt as little as possible and only when ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY -- This might be the most
difficult one of all, but also the easiest one of all. Let the speaker speak. that's it. And you listen. That's it. And ask for clarity when clarity is needed.
4. Pay very close attention to EVERYTHING -- Listen but also notice what's being said, HOW it's being said, what ISN'T being said. Sometimes these non-verbal clues are more important than the words themselves.
If you can learn to read people and their non-verbal cues (including body language), you will possess a truly remarkable gift.
5. Withhold Judgment -- Most of us hear people talking but don't actually listen. Often, we've made up our minds about someone or their position within the first 5 seconds of someone opening their mouth (you know that's not an
exaggeration!). Instead, keep an open mind and allow yourself to be persuaded if it's something that can be of benefit to you.
6. Reinforce -- Part of being a good listener is to reinforce the information you're receiving. One of the best ways to do that is to capture part of what's being said and relate it to an example or
story or incident in your life. I don't mean you should turn the conversation away from the speaker and focus on yourself. What I mean is to apply what you've heard and give a concrete example that shows you've fully absorbed what's been said. Again, this shows that you value the information you've just received.
Make sense?
If only people realized just how incredibly powerful this skill is, they would be jumping through hoops to learn the secrets.
I hope you take these tips to heart.
If you have any comments, ideas or suggestions, please email me at:
nader@copticchamber.com.
Until next time...
Your friend,
